Tuesday, January 29, 2008

My Boy - The Genius

I went to my son's school to meet with his teacher for a conference.


She is not his regular teacher - she is only his teacher for Social Studies and Science.


I don't know her very well - like I know his other teacher.


She was very nice.


We sat at the table in her room, went over issues Little Billy has been having about not remembering things - like ... when tests are coming up ... reviewing for tests ... studying for tests ... failing tests! (He is going to be the death of me!)

He seemed to understand when his teacher and I impressed that he needed to make sure - from now on - to mark in his Agenda, when a test was coming up.


He seemed to understand when his teacher and I impressed that he needed to - from now on - pay attention during the review.


He seemed to understand when his teacher and I impressed that he needed to - from now on - complete the review sheet in order to receive an extra 5 points.


He seemed to understand when his teacher and I impressed that he needed to - from now on - study for these TESTS!


He says he understands now!


We will see!


So ... we completed our conference and we were all smiling.


Somehow, we got on the subject of students in middle school and high school taking foreign languages. We were telling Little Billy that it would be good if he took Spanish - as we live in Texas and Spanish sure comes in handy.


Little Billy quickly said, "I want to take French."

His teacher and I just giggled and she said, "Well ... that would be good too."

Then Little Billy changed his mind and said, "No ... I really want to take British."


*blink blink*


I look at his teacher and she looks at me. She does not say a word and I can tell she is trying to hold back a smile. She's not sure - not sure, I guess - whether or not I know - that this is ridiculous and so she seems to wait for me to make a move - to smile or something.

I smile.

She smiles.

I look over at my genius of a son, who, by the way, is now speaking in a British accent (that he does very well) and I say, "Hon - you can't take British. British isn't a language. Do you know what language they speak in Great Britain?"

He, in his exaggerated British accent, says, "No I don't - but I want to learn it."


On the upside ... On the way to our car, I explain to my son that they speak... ENGLISH in Great Britain and that ... while his accent is adorable and pretty darn accurate as far as I can tell - to ... not ever say that again to anyone - EVER! He asked, "Why," and I told him ... in my most fabulous British accent, "Because ... it makes you look like a bloomin' idiot, Sweetie." I think he understood.

95 comments:

Brittany said...

ha ha ha! Oh my goodness! That is so innocent. Take the Spanish Billy!!! I regret taking German. I've used it once since High school... and it was to decipher something from a movie. haha. I could have used Spanish today at McDonalds! lol

Janice said...

To cute, I love that. Kids say and do the darndest things don't they?

girlymom said...

HA! I think you nailed it when you stated- genious! Hmmm Although sometimes when I hear British, I mean English spoken by someone from Great Britain- I can't understand a word, maybe there should be a class. :)
Of course no offense to those I can't understand...I live amongst 2 year olds!

Jen said...

I'm with girlymom - I can't understand a bloody word they are saying either. I have been known to tell my husband, "Is this a British film, because I'm gonna need subtitles". Those conferences are tough (I've had to give many as a teacher). I would say she did a great job (not laughing, until you were out of the room).

Crystal said...

Bahaha. BRITISH! Oh that boy.

Don Mills Diva said...

HA - I did not see that ending coming and it made me laugh out loud. Very funny!

Hillary said...

Hee hee! That's so funny! I love it! Well, not the failing tests part--I hope that gets better. :)

LunaNik said...

Ok so that's the cutest story you have ever told on this blog since I've been reading.

You guys seriously need your own reality show.

I'm going to write a letter to Lifetime or A&E; or something and point them in the direction of your blog. I'm serious. I would totally watch your show!

pb&j in a bowl said...

Oh man, that's great! That story made my night.

Dawn said...

That's funny- I'm passing this story on to my British friend, he'll love it!

Jacki said...

My mom received her card today and she was very excited! She said you have beautiful handwriting. :-)

Jen said...

Priceless. What a card.

Cheeky said...

Hilarious! That is what I want to do in my spare time - learn British! BWahahaha!

Maria said...

Hey, I want to learn British, too! My 14 year old already knows it! That was great. Gotta appreciate them for their differences.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

This would be about the time my husband and I would look at each other and say, "Lets take a vacation--with his college fund!"

JCK said...

Hey, at least he's creative. And maybe gifted with accents. He'll definitely attract the girls! Not that that is vital, by any means. :)

Are You Serious! said...

That is so funny! I love it. I'm thinking about going back to school when the kids are all in school and it scares me to think that I would have to take a foreign language. I wonder if they offer British here! I think that's one I might be able to handle. :)

Abbie said...

AHHHH! hahaha That is TOO funny Kellan!! Oh my goodness, to be a fly on your wall most days, would just kill me I tell ya! :)

Leah said...

Oh I really enjoyed this post and it's brought me out of lurkdom :) My daughter is 4 and she confuses english and chinese and japanese constantly and it is endlessly amusing to me :) So I love his desire to want to learn British :)

Bavani said...

hahha - I get that all the time, FROM ADULTS asking me whether I speak Singaporean since I'm from Singapore???
And I tell them patiently, no the main spoken/read/written language in Singapore is English.

So Billy is definitely excused for his innocence :)

Family Adventure said...

Your Billy boy cracks me up. Your blog just would not be the same without him :)

Heidi

JO-N said...

Haha, those confusion! These are the moments we, parents, enjoy most although sometimes they get on our nerves.

the dragonfly said...

Gotta love kids...

And as far as the topic goes...I wish I could learn *any* language. I had Spanish in high school and German in college, and I know nothing of either language. I tried and tried and tried, but despite my best efforts, I do not have a gift for languages.

*sigh*

That German sure would come in handy now, since I live in Germany...

kim-d said...

BWAHAHAHA! I'll bet it just kills his teacher, trying to keep a straight face around him sometimes! "Mama said there'd be days like this." Indeed :)!

imbeingheldhostage said...

Hey, don't laugh too hard. I wish I had taken some British before moving here. I imagine I look like a blooming idiot (here we'd say daft)when I stare blankly during the quiet time in which I have to respond. I'm usually still chewing through what has been said! TAKE the British lessons, you can learn Spanish by reading the cereal boxes :-)

Queeny said...

Bloody hilarious. Saayyy, he could take lessons from Britney Spears' alter ego (sorry, I had to say it.)

Funny, your Billy.

Nicki said...

Well, I guess it would be the easiest "foreign language" to learn:)

Happy Days said...

He is too funny!

One Scrappy Chicklet said...

Bwwwwaaaaahaaaaaahaaaaaa. Thank you for a lol first thing in the morning. Little Billy is more than welcome to come to Arkansas and visit my d-man anytime. D-man must be a genius also because he always "seems to understand".

Have a great "British" day,
Tami

jennwa said...

You son is too funny!!!

Slow Panic said...

so funny. and so eerily familiar (all the you need to study stuff).

One Scrappy Gal said...

This was funny!! :) Maybe little Billy will be a trailblazer and British classes will crop up all over America just because of him. :)

Katrina said...

SO funny! Your Jimmy reminds me a lot of my little brother, Nick.

Lisa said...

BWAHAHA! Sorry. I couldn't help it!

Steph said...

Too funny :) My 6-year-old once told me that a child in her class spoke a different English.

missy said...

When I was a teenager I SO wanted to have a British accent! Tell him I understand!

Irene said...

I think learning British would be cool. They sound so much more classy than we do! I think he's on to something!

Very funny!

Kelly said...

I don't know what is funnier, what he said, or how you responded to it.

You are so awesome that my post was dedicated to you and your rotten fruit from yesterday.

Thanks for blogging the way you do.

Sheri said...

Oh! He is a hoot!

OHmommy said...

OH! MY! GOSH!


I am rolling on the ground with laughter and CAN NOT stop. Sweet little,Billy! LOL. Oh, Billy! I can't wait for you tell this story to his future wife. Maybe they will honeymoon in Great Britian!

Melissa said...

Bwhhahahah! That is so hysterical that you got to say that to him!!!

jennifer h said...

I'm with Little Billy. I might actually be able to master that language. This was so funny.

Patti said...

Ah but in all fairness to Little Billy the Kings English is so different from ours! Boot.. Bonnet.. Fag .. all have entirely different meaning across the pond!

Joanna said...

Classic! I love parent/teacher conferences!! Since I home school I sit down with myself and have some chocolate. Then I tell myself that it will get better and they really are a joy to teach - best I've ever had even! Hey ya gotta do what ya gotta do! :)

Holly said...

Hehehe, that is pretty darn funny!

Jennifer said...

Oh, but think of all of the girls he'll get with that British accent! ;)

Summer said...

Oh my goodness. Too hilarious!

kimmy said...

Kids are so funny! Sometimes it's the little things that they do that make my husband and I laugh so hard!

Kimmy

Holly said...

He's hysterical. And, he'd fit into our accented house perfectly. My husband is British and all have regular conversations in British English and Scottish English. It's quite fun!

Courtney said...

He may be the death of you, but at least he's entertaining, right? I love how you added sweetie after you told him it made him look like a bloomin idiot! Too funny, then again you always are!

Laura said...

"Bloody Hell" that was funny!

You have a fire cracker on your hands!!!

Thanks for sharing, I needed a good laugh today!

Laurie M. said...

Haha! Wow that is so funny! BRITISH! Keep a close eye on that one- or he WILL be the death of you.

kim-d said...

Kellan, I'm so sorry you've got the crud! I hope you're feeling better SOON. Yuck!

ValleyGirl said...

That's just too funny!!! But hey, if he ever moves to Canada, that French would help him get a nice government job. Oh wait, you don't want him working for the Canadian government -- scratch that. He'll do well in Louisiana, too!! Plus it's much closer to home!

Rima said...

I dunno, I think a translator might have come in handy on occasion the last time I was in England!

What a cute story!

justabeachkat said...

Too funny! I can just see your face and the teacher's! Kids really do say the funniest things!
(wish I could say that in a British accent!)

Hugs!
Kat

Lizzy in the Burbs said...

Hi, Kellan!

I'm sorry to hear you're under the weather, hope you're feeling better real soon!

I LOVED that story! Little Billy is just too much! He actually has a point in a way, though. My husband traveled to England last year on business. He stayed in a townhome in the country (they are very common, don't really have hotels) and when he first arrived they gave him a list of rules, etc. One of the items said something to the effect of, "When leaving the kitchen, be sure to check the hobs and make sure they're off." My husband didn't know what a "hob" was! Turned out it was the burners on the stove. Who knew? :)

Feel better!

Lizzy

Marie said...

Oh my gosh...how very funny!

Mo said...

If he really wants to learn British, you can let him learn which of their words are different from ours (barrister=attorney, biscuit=cookie, chips=french fries, rubbish-bin=trashcan, lorry=truck, etc). He might enjoy that...and it'd be cute to hear him say the words in his British accent!

Amy said...

Kellan I just LOVE your stories, and I just LOVE your little Billy and I want him to marry my little Abby!! Sounds like they have a lot in common, from now on... a phrase used frequently with her.
Thanks for the great laugh!

Wonderful World of Weiners said...

I think he should speak British if he wants to speak British! I also think that's a great to impress people - he can correctly tell people that he mastered a new language!!

Hallie

Queen of My Domain said...

That is to funny! I think that half the time we do need a translation for British english to American english.

Valarie said...

Hey, have you ever tried to talk with a decent British accent?? I think it's as hard as learning German! And some of the phrases and words they use....it is a ottally different language!! I say more power to him!

girlymom said...

I enjoy your friendship too Kellan! Thanks for always being there~ somehow you always deliver a smile!

andrea j said...

That was definitely a LOL story. Maybe that will get him to study harder in English at least.

Pam in Colorado said...

I've been checking out some British movies from the library lately and some times I have such a time trying to figure out what is being said.

Perhaps Billy could become an interpreter for those of us with accent challenges. ;)

Just wanted to pass a short and easy thing your way - Tag You're IT!

Mighty Morphin' Mama said...

That is the best story!
Here's hoping he gets it together for Social studies soon.

Sharon said...

What is lingering in the minds of our children....I'm not sure I want to know. :)
But--hey...at least the British would be a quick study for him.

And girl--I soooooooo hope he gets the test thing down pat.....I have some mighty beautiful gray hair to prove it was a long battle with my son. Praying for your sanity. :) Or a good dye job.

Amy said...

Maybe Billy wants to take classes that he is SURE to pass, you know, to help his GPA.

TheVasquez3 said...

hilarious!!

Susan said...

He is too funny. How do you do it without cracking up.

Dad said...

Oh to be a child again ! !

Pam said...

aren't parent teacher conferences just grand?? I love that story! I will be giggling at that one for a little while!

joan said...

Oh this is too funny. I took Latin, do they even offer that anymore in schools? But I love the fact that he does a good British accent. Have a good evening Kellan.

shay said...

That is bloody hilarious! (that was written in my best British lol)

What a nut! How did you not laugh right out loud?!

thirtysomething said...

That is the funniest thing I ever read!

Karen said...

I love it! I'd so love to hear his accent.

Toni said...

Oh, that is one of those stories that show up in toasts at weddings....

Hetha said...

He's certainly a charmer! I love him! I think you should keep him Kellan.

The Boyds Family said...

That is quite possibly the funniest thing I've heard all day long!! I LOVE your blogs!! Thanks for the laugh!

Bia said...

i loved how you softened "bloomin' idiot" with "sweetie"! that word is a southern marvel...you can insult someone while being polite at the same time! i just may have to post about it's use.

God bless!

Andrea said...

Oh, what a cute story!! :)

Amy said...

so cute...you could always tell him he probably already is taking British..I mean english...LOL

Kathryn said...

He is just too cute! Of course it sounds like a different language to him! he he

Anna said...

What a sweetpea! Of course he wants to take British...probably very little studying involved! ;-)

onthegomom said...

The phrase I say ALL THE TIME about my 14 year old is... (He is going to be the death of me!) :-)

multipleblessings said...

Maybe I'll stop laughing soon... ;)

bermudabluez said...

You simply HAVE to write a book!!! It would definitely be on the NYTimes Best Seller List!!

Heather said...

Well, when you look at it his way, he is already bilingual. And I have to know, did he tell his teacher to stop being a nag?

Shannon said...

Seriously Kellan... That is fantastic! Where do you come up with these stories? Your kids are giving you so much awesome material. I need to start looking "On the upside"! Life would be so hysterical! In that situation I don't think I could have gotten past the failing tests. I am such a dud!

Karen MEG said...

That son of yours is just the cutest! That was hilarious, thanks for a great chuckle Kellan!

Angela said...

Now that would have been great if only he had understood what he said

forgetfulone said...

Your life is so hilarious! I just read interesting story after interresting story, almost all of them humorous. Isn't it grand?

My Goodness said...

Hilarious as usual, that boy child!!!

Angela said...

Even my husband kept laughing as I read this allowed. And well like most men, he's not always enamored with other people's blogs or the stories I think are funny! That's so great!

Have a great weekend Kellen!

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