Alexis believes most anything I tell her.
She depends on me to ... teach her.
She depends on me to ... guide her.
She depends on me to ...
Tell her the truth.
And ...
Most of the time ...
I do.
Tell her the truth.
But ...
Sometimes ...
I can't help myself.
Like the other day ...
When ...
Little Billy came home from one of his out-exploring-the-world afternoons and brought home this ...
"Well ... it's a unicorn horn - of course," I tell Alexis, in response to her question whilst standing in our kitchen.
"But ... are they supposed to be all scaly like that," she reaches over and touches the scaly horn.
I shake my head most confidently, "Why yes - that is how they look when they fall off. And when they fall off ... all the unicorn glitter falls off too - leaving them looking like this," I am smiling a big smile, all the while looking into my darling girl's adorable face.
She is a little excited now.
Excited by the fact that we - she and I - are in possession of a REAL LIVE UNICORN HORN - right in the middle of our kitchen - sitting right there on the kitchen table. She can't stop smiling.
But then ... she does stop smiling for just a moment and says, "Is there really such a thing as unicorns?" I don't know what took her so long to ask.
So ... what do I say?
Do I wiggle my way out of this fantasy discussion?
Do I confess to my ridiculous lies and tell the sweet child the truth?
Or ...
Do I continue with the pretense?
Continue to try to make Alexis believe there are in fact unicorns and they live right in our neighborhood - right near our house?
Yes ...
I lie!
I say ...
"Well ... here's it's horn - isn't it?"
On the upside ... While Alexis and I were happily discussing our unicorn theories in the kitchen ... in the living room - was Little Billy - SCREAMING, "IT'S AN ARMADILLO TAIL! IT'S AN ARMADILLO TAIL AND ...WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER YOU TOUCH IT, BECAUSE DAD SAYS IT CAN HAVE A DISEASE THAT WILL MESS UP YOUR FACE!"
Poor Alexis .......... I'm pretty sure she was better off believing it was a unicorn's horn - yep!
60 comments:
Kellan~ that is hysterical.
I knew immediately what it was... but I would totally have told Princess the same thing.
I'm sitting here thinking, what IS that?!?! I am so glad you revealed what that object actually was--I had no idea...us Iowa gals, well, we don't see many armadillos up in this neck of the woods! Too funny!
It took her THAT long to catch on with Little Billy in the back yelling?
little billy is such the big brother... worrying about little alexis' beautiful face and all...
i'm just sayin':D
love and hugs,
dani xx
Did she wash her hands? I would hate for her face to get messed up. Isn't that as much of a "lie" as your unicorn story?
KEEP BELIEVING
I would have had to lie too! I had no clue as to what it was!! Take Care Kellan!!
I would have believed you--I've never seen an Armadillo tail.
That sounds EXACTLY like something my own mother would do! She had my brother and me believing all kinds of ridiculous things when we were growing up. All in good fun!
You're hilarious. And that thing is ...ewwwww.
♡ So funny! I have never even see a real live armadillo I mean UNICORN! Crazy that they're right there in your back yard.
That was awesome! Poor girl, I would much rather have the unicorn story. but now I have to know, do armadillos lose their tails like snakes do their skin? or what?
Oh, sweet Alexis and her dashed hopes by hysterical little Billy. I love these adventures!
You do realize, don't you, that this WILL come up in her therapy in about 20 years? And that every predicament she encounters in her later life will be traced back to this "unicorn incident." Yup, I'm pretty sure you won't be 2008 Mother of the Year, based on this! (Plus, Little Billy will be single-handedly responsible for having "puppy dog tails" changed to "ARMADILLO tails!!!)... :)
Nonetheless...
Have a wonderful day, Kellan Renee!
What a nice story, i love childhood innocence.
Ahhh now see I had noooo idea what the heck it was but would of totally beleived ya!! :) HAHA!!
Do you mean to tell me you can just walk around near your house and find an armadillo tail? And where exactly is the armadillo that was attached to this tail?
Hallie
Ohhhhh for a minute there I thought it WAS a unicorn tail.
darn it.
Kids find the darndest things don't they?
What Hallie said - we don't have armadillos around here. If the tail is no longer on the armadillo, does that mean it has gone to armadillo/unicorn heaven?
Also went and saw the video - your interview is wonderful - it was great to hear your lovely voice and see more of you. :)
LOL at "it can have a disease that can mess up your face!" That is too funny. Yep, I'd want her to believe in the unicorn tail too!
I've never, ever seen an armidillo, so I had NO IDEA what it was. *lol* All I can say is... Ewwww!!
Maybe next time you can spray some glitter on it before she sees it, then she'll really believe you! *lol*
That is quite the ugly looking armadillo tail. I'm convinced I could never live in Texas.
I would much rather believe that it's a unicorn horn also :)
Having no unicorns :) or armadillos in NC I had no clue! I first thought ice cream cones in a million sizes LOL....
LOL!!!! I was hoping you would really tell us what it was! i have never even seen an armadillo before, now I know what their tails look like! :)
Oh, man...I'm laughing my head off here! THat was hilarious!!
I love that she's trying so hard to buy into the fanciful thought, and here's little Billy in the background taking the wind out of her sails, lol.
Funny stuff, Kellan.
Leave it to the boys to change the whole story! ;)
I think I like the unicorn tale better...
Kellan,
Hi, there! It's been a very long time since I've "talked" to you, I miss you! Thanks so much for the sweet comments you left me, I truly appreciate your sentiment! I had to come by (and pull out of my self-imposed "retirement") to tell you that thanks to Kim-d (she told me about it), I saw the interview you did on t.v.,and I think it was AMAZING!! You were so great on that show, and you portrayed mommy blogging in such a genuine and truthful way, you were just awesome! It's funny, but your voice sounds just like I thought it would, and you and your kids were just adorable! I hope lots of new people will come and check out your blog, and who knows? Maybe some publisher will check it out as well and decide to make your blog a book?? That would be the icing on the cake! Hope all is well with you and yours, trying to get caught up on all your posts. The baby looks so good! I'm very happy for your family that he continues to grow bigger and healthier each day, what a little miracle he is! I'm also relieved that you are feeling much better, and that beautiful vacation you took must have been just what you needed! The pictures of the beach are gorgeous! Well, Kellan, take care and I'll stop by again to see what you're up to soon! (you're now my most "famous" friend, how cool is that??) :) p.s. I much prefer to believe that thing is a unicorn horn, thankuverymuch!
I had NO idea it was an armadillo tail! I like the unicorn horn much better.
Hey I believe in little white lies and pink glittery lies are even nicer!
YUCK! That's just the uglies thing ever. I think I'll just continue to think of it as a unicorn horn...much less creepier that way!
Do those tails normally fall off or did something happen to it? We don't get many armadillos here in North Carolina!
That totally sounds like something my mom would say! And I don't think you're lying- you're pretending. Right?
a disease that would mess up your face!!! LOL!!! ack! (maybe that's what happened to me...LOL!!)
What a great story Kellan, and I don't see anything wrong with letting the fairytales live on for as long as possible. Emily just turned six and is convinced there are fairies living outside.... I don't tell her otherwise (you never know!!)
Aw, bummer that she didn't get to keep on believing it was a unicorn horn! I think its cool to let a little bit of magic exist in a kid's world, don't you? ;)
Kellan, what a fantastic story, you make me laugh more every time I visit your blog....don't ever stop!!!!
love and hugs to you,
Tabitha XXX
That is so funny, Kellen. It reminds me of the things my mother used to pretend. I think I'll post about that. This brought a smile to my face.
This is so hilarious! I've never even seen an armadillo tail! I'm cracking up at my desk.
You are so bad! I hope you didn't catch any disease that will "mess up your face!" Har!
Hey, being a Jersey girl in PA, I'm just proud of myself that I KNEW WHAT IT WAS! YEE HAH!
I like it better as a Unicorn Horn, too...oh well.
She was so cute...trying to still believe...
Blessings, EJT
Oh, boys. They can never let girls have their fun.
Oh my Gosh, an armadillo tail. No way! YUCK! Please lie to me too and tell me it's a unicorn horn. Please. :)
I'm so glad you mentioned what it was, I was racking my brain over here trying to figure out what it was!! I mean other than a unicorn horn...;)
Really, it's an armadillo tail?? I think I like the idea of a unicorn's horn better. LOL
I would have never known what it was! Is that bad? Eww it has a disease that will mess up your face....that is just wrong!
we dont have those here, so as far as I was concerned I was believing you also. And that thing is yucky!
Okay, you make me laugh. BUT where the HECK is the rest of the armadillo?
too funny and even funnier that you got caught in such a whopper lol.
I TOTALLY would have done the same thing - but this rendition is HILARIOUS!
And sincere congrats for that FANTASTIC video you did (post below), I am so amazed! VERY WELL DONE!
How does it feel to be famous? :)
Awww...what a fun couple minutes you guys had with that...too bad the magic was broken by the truth. Darn that truth!!!
I much preferred your version to Little Billy's, too :)
Heidi
Ok, you can tell I am from Michigan and there are NO armadillos here...Ew!
I love her imagination and would have had a hard time squishing the idea of a unicorn too.
Awww... I'm all about letting the little ones believe in magic for as long as possible. There is NO magic at all in an armadillo tail!
Unicorn horn? Armadillo tail? It's all in your perspective. And I was thinking it looked a bit like a leprechaun's hat. :)
Oh how I miss those times when the kids would believe in almost anything you tell them. Cute post.
Hope your weekend is a good one.
Hugs!
Kat
The unicorn story is much better.
That's so funny!
I'm here from blogher, and assume that since you were on SA living that you live in SA. So do we, and I haven't seen a single armadillo this year. I guess I'd rather see the whole thing besides just it's tail though. That's pretty gross. LOL
Hahaha - can't believe she didn't pick up on it with Billy yelling in the background.
But that horn? Eww.
Unicorns are real in the world of makebelieve
We have nothing of the sort up here in New England...my brain was spinning trying to think of what that thing might be! I'll be honest...I never would have guessed armadillO!
it has been awhile since I have laughed THAT hard. Thanks Kellan!
(I would have gone with the unicorn story too - all the way!)
This is why I'm glad I have two girls. I would have gone on pretending with them and convincing them it was a unicorn's horn forever...or until their father would ruin the moment by telling them the truth. Damn boys.
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